You Gonna Eat That?

Two men sit at the counter in a diner. One man is a rather large fellow sitting in front of a coffee and a plate with only the trace remains of a once-delicious meal. He looks over at the man next to him, who has polished off half of a steak and eggs breakfast. The large man eyes his neighbor’s fresh piece of apple pie, sitting there untouched. The fat man decides to go for broke. “You gonna eat that?” he asks the gentleman. “Excuse me?” he replies. “That pie. You gonna eat that pie?” says the fat man, mouth watering at the prospect of soon becoming the owner of that slice. “I was planning on it,” says the gentleman, “right after I finish my breakfast here.” “C’mon, it looks so good.” “No!” The gentleman starts to get a little annoyed. “That’s why I got it.” This puzzles the fat man. “Please?” he practically begs. “No! Get your own damn pie!” The fat man grabs a fork and tries to snag a bite from the plate. “Hey, what the hell?!” The gentleman knocks his hand away, grabs his plate, and moves farther down the counter a few seats over. The fat man, feeling rejected, looks around the diner and suddenly spots a woman two seats away on his opposite side with a large ice cream sundae. “You gonna eat that?”

Cody Kizis